300

Nicole:

Very fittingly, Kyle and I sat down last night to watch 300. It’s the first of our estimated 300 movies that we own and have decided to watch in alphabetical order. A quick synopsis is that King Leonidas, played by Gerard Butler, will not let the Persians make slaves of the Spartans by kneeling to their army. He is denied by the powers that be to go to war. So he finds a way around them by taking a walk to Thermopylae, Greece with 300 of his caped boy short clad “bodyguards”. Just so happens that the Persian army can possibly be stopped in such a place.

If you can get past the battle cries, blood splatter and slow motion severed limbs flying through the air, this movie is actually really beautiful. It’s graphic novel stylization transports us to another time and dimension where men are men and women are… well, men. In the Spartan world, women have just as much voice as the men do and it’s really fun to watch. A piece of advice, don’t dick around with Queen Gorgo. King Leonidas is off fighting for his family and their home and Queen Gorgo is home fighting for her husband and his men. The balance is lovely and done well in a movie made for boys. I liked this movie for the experience that it provided. It tickles me to see dudes that have swagger back up their claims with some badassery. Having it based on an actual battle also adds some solidarity to the plot. It is not meant to be historically accurate and needs to be watched with your favorite dude that will want to throw suplexes and some of the furniture around the room when the credits roll. With all of this said, I’m not sure I would buy this movie to add to a home collection. It’s done well and I liked it the first time on the big screen, but it’s not one that I revisit time and time again. I rate it 3 1/2 well defined abs out of 6.

What are your thoughts on 300? Love it? Hate it? Tell us what you think. 

Kyle:

My one-sentence review of this movie is “uber-stylized, wildly historically inaccurate brain candy depiction of guys whose abs have abs that take on a God-king and lose”. However, that doesn’t tell the whole tale. I actually liked this movie (and not because Nicole and I snuck beer into it when we saw it in the theater). It’s based off of a Frank Miller graphic novel, so if you like the stylings of movies such as Sin City (which I did) and Suckerpunch (which I didn’t), then you will likely find this a fun flick to watch. Sure, it’s campy and there are loads of unbelievable scenes, but sometimes isn’t that the best part of watching a movie? Don’t take it too seriously, make yourself a rare steak, pour a class of mulled wine, and enjoy it. Cheers.

By the way, this movie is NJA (Not Janet Approved). I give it 5/6 toned abs.